Not with that attitude, it isn’t.

Maybe it’s Maybelline.

I remember this from my childhood. The elastic elements of the straps were tightly wound metal coils/springs. Good luck getting your hair out of that after combing your head with the massage instrument.

The higher you hover, the taller the splash.

At the bottom of the space between the bed and the wall where all the food crumbs, dead skin cells, hair, and dirt have been accumulating for years, the Null Island floats atop the carpet.

Like a fun-sized, personal great garbage patch of the pacific.

Buy a sleep mask online and get it delivered to your bed’s GPS coordinates.

Rifles & Roses, Black Weekend, Rage against the factory, Audiovisualslave