• Kowowow@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    7 months ago

    this reminds me of a mental pebble in my shoe, sometimes it feels like there is an age category problem, “woman” still feels too old/mature no matter how old I get and “girls” sounds too young at this point, “chicks” is my go to because feels vague enough but maybe I just need work on my vocabulary

    • BillyClark@piefed.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      7 months ago

      I’ve been recently trying to phase my usage of “girls” out when referring to women, because it’s unintentionally belittling. I’ve settled on just saying “woman” when referring to an adult woman in general.

      Of course, if you’re referring to a woman in person, you need to refer to her as “milady” and tip your hat. That’s just basic etiquette.

    • scarabic@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      7 months ago

      Speaking generously, I can see what you mean. But I think people only have this problem when they are used to calling people “girls” far too long. If you shake that bad habit, you won’t find yourself coming into conflict with these terms so often.

      May I suggest the term “young women” as a highly respectful way to refer to younger folks. And if you are truly in doubt or referring to a mixed group, “ladies” is an alternative too.

      I don’t recommend “chicks.” Some people are okay with it but many are not. A chick is a newly hatched bird, so this is quite infantilizing.

    • ricecake@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      7 months ago

      Girl is a child. Woman is an adult. Young woman if it’s vaguely in between.

      Female if you’re doing medicine or science.

      The girl lost her doll. The woman paid her taxes. The young women got dropped off at the movies. The female puffin lays one egg per season and shares the burden of caring for the puffling equally with their mate.

      • cadekat@pawb.social
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        7 months ago

        “Ladies” can come across as sleazy, imo. And sometimes you’re in a situation where the class/status suggested by “lady” ends up sounding sarcastic.

        “Gals” implies a level of friendship, and “dames” is too old timey.

        It’s a tight rope walk of sounding too familiar/formal, implying old/young, or being insulting/demeaning… I conclude that we need a new word.

        • scarabic@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          7 months ago

          I think we often forget about “young man” and “young woman.”

          When someone is too young to safely call a woman, “young woman” is quite a compliment and gives her the respect of an adult anyway. If someone is just barely too old to be called a girl, they will probably find it neutral enough. And if someone is much too old to be called a girl they will appreciate it as flattery.

          • cadekat@pawb.social
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            0
            ·
            7 months ago

            To quote the earlier comment:

            “woman” still feels too old/mature no matter how old I get

            • MohamedMoney@feddit.org
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              7 months ago

              Yes, I read that. I also read your comment und you concluded (somewhat jokingly, I know), that ‘we’ need a new word for ‘women’.

              My, now more elaborate, response to that is, that ‘we’ don’t need a new word, you should learn to use the perfectly cromulent available ones.

        • scarabic@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          7 months ago

          I guess I can see some ways that “lady” or “ladies” could sound sleazy but I’m surprised if this is someone’s first or only association. “Lady” is literally a landed title, the equivalent of “Lord,” and the highly dignified counterpart to “gentleman.”

          • cadekat@pawb.social
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            7 months ago

            No no, definitely not what I meant! In some circumstances, it can be sleazy (like “hey ladies”).