Then… don’t report him…

Next press conference: “they’re doing amazing things with the skateboard - you heard of the, the, and the guy was fat, real fat, much fatter than me. I’m much slimmer. So the skateboard it’s small now, have you heard this? So small. Just need the finger. 2 fingers. So small. So we’re gonna use the skateboard. Just 2 fingers. China can’t make em this small. Just us. Just USA. And the skateboard will take the bombs straight to Iran. No need for aircraft carriers anymore. Just the skateboard.”

In his dementia addled brain, he probably now thinks this is a real event that actually happened, because he saw the video.