Sometimes when I’m at the dairy, wandering aimlessly, in the corner of my eye I’ll spot a smooth rounded female shape and it will peak my interest. The moment I focus and realise it’s my wife I’ve scouted I will immediately relax in to the most content state. I love her so much.

Could have said “Whoops, wrong number”.

Fake. You forget you’re married, you’re not texting coherently to the person you intended. Should have made the joke a post surgery interaction.